Star of Bravo’s Millionaire Matchmaker and love and relationship expert, Patti Stanger regularly dishes out dating and relationship tips to her clients and fans on her website, Pattiknows.com.
Thinking about rekindling the flame with a former love? Patti shares her take on re-exploring the already explored.
Ignore Your Heart
During messy breakups and make-ups your heart is your own worst enemy. Instead, you need to become BFFs with another organ – your brain! It’s your brain that’s going to help you think critically and make smarter decisions. Your heart is just going to want you to find someone to spoon.
Anyone who’s been a victim of infidelity, distrust or just plain deep hurt is going to have to take time to figure out what will make him or her feel comfortable and secure in a rekindled relationship. And, anyone who may be asking for forgiveness is going to need to be flexible and figure out what will help his or her partner trust again. Renegotiating these new boundaries is going to be a whole lot of trial and error. Both parties will need to be patient with each other because it definitely won’t be easy. They’ll both have to keep their eyes on the ultimate prize of a solid and loving relationship.
Talk to an Expert
Couples who are trying to get back together after a betrayal should seek help from a therapist – someone they both trust, someone out of the spotlight that can help monitor their progress, keep them from playing the blame game and keep them on track to mend their relationship. Without outside help, they are more likely to fall victim to temptation, to seek revenge and to fall apart again. A therapist who doesn’t take sides just may be the key to saving true love.